When the child grows, a really difficult question appears in most moms’ minds: How to stay close with your growing son?
From the moment our beloved babies were born and the doctor took them to be weighed, measured, and bundled, everything about them becomes our highest priority. As parents, we follow every step in our child’s life. Though we always want our children to be mature, many moms can’t help feeling sad when thinking that “my son is growing up and he is pulling away from me”.
Your son will be mature one day
Yes! Along with the time, your little ones will become adults, both in terms of their physical and mental health. Their maturity, of course, doesn’t happen overnight. However, for many moms, they are always their small kids. And sometimes, many mothers were startled to realize that their son has been mature.
As a little boy, your son will lighten up when he sees you walk around the room. The kid likes hanging around parents anywhere you go. And his tight hugs assured every mom that he will surely think about them when they are apart.
The sweet love of our sons makes us feel so happy. There have been many times, we selfishly wish that they are always children so that we can keep loving and cherishing them forever.
However, admit it, ladies, our sons will grow up. Over time, his behavior towards us changes so much. One day, you will realize that your son no longer looks at you like you were a gift to him in this world. But that totally makes sense. He is now busy with sports, with his passions, and many other relationships.
Moms, it might be a knife to the heart when you went in to kiss your son’s forehead but he pulled away. Don’t be shocked. This is not a break-up! Just your son is growing up and he changes. But you can do many things to make your relationship better.
This is not Jessica’s experience as my little boy is now only 2 years old. But I know one day he will also grow up. And I find it important to learn all these skills from my mom, my aunt, and my sister.
So, how to stay close with your growing son? The following tips may be what you need to rekindle your mother-son bond.
How to stay close with your growing son?
On trying to answer how to stay close with your growing son, moms should keep this in mind: As long as you want to strengthen your mother-son relationship, you will find great motivation to make some adjustments and listen to his heart.
Tip 1: Show him your interest in something he concerns
Joining in on a hobby of your son is a necessary step to connect with him. To do that, moms first need to pay more attention to the hobby of their sons. For example, you need to know whether he likes playing video games or sports.
Knowing his pursuit, mom now should pick at least one activity that your son takes part in, and then try to show interest in it regularly. Don’t just ask your child about it, you should actively join in his passion.
You can ask your son to teach you how to play that game, watch a show he loves or start riding bikes together. By this way, you seem to be a close friend of your son! Is that great?
Tip 2: Give your son freedom
Am I wrong to say this? Giving a child freedom when we need to be closer to him?
No, I’m telling you a very important step. And it may sound quite contradicting to bond with your son by giving him space, moms should actually do this!
Not just in your parenting tips, you also need “trust” as an important factor to a healthy relationship with your son. As the boy grows up, he wants to feel independent and free, more than ever!
At those times of your son’s life, it would be good to show him that you have faith in him as a human by giving some age-appropriate freedoms. It can be some age-appropriate chores for your son to do. For example, you may:
- Allow your son to walk to his friend’s house (if you think it’s safe)
- Give him some tasks around the house (vacuum, mow the lawn or take out the garbage).
- Tell him to look after younger siblings or cousins.
Tip 3: Talk to your son like a grown-up
When your son grows up, some romantic dialogue like “How are you, my baby boy” no longer seems appropriate. Even, your child may cringe when hearing that.
Moms now need to realize that our son is likely to respond so much better when you talk to him like an adult. You can ask him some open-ended questions about his life at this stage. For example, you can ask him about his plan for the next weekend or something similar.
A very key step to remember is to open up about your own life. Let your son hear your stories. Tell him your own feelings and other things going on in your life.
Tip 4: Plan a mom and son date night
Well, this sounds quite romantic, right? Mom can totally think about this as a way to be close to your growing son. Spend intentional quality time with your boy by scheduling a special mom and son “date night”. These simple ideas may make him surprised:
- Making a pizza together
- Watching movie night
- Doing a puzzle
- Going bowling
- Going to a sports game together
No need to prepare anything too complex. The goal is simply to build closeness, trust and also make your son feel valued.
Tip 5: Never stop showing your affection
As your son becomes mature, he may not let you cuddle him for too long. But this doesn’t mean mom should stop showing him your affection – it’s exactly the strength of mom love!
And try to do this as naturally as possible. For example, you can offer your hand while you walk by him. You can also give him a hug when he leaves or even a gentle squeeze on his shoulders will let him feel your special love!
Your son will grow up! But anyway, they are always your children. Your love for him stays forever and so does he! Don’t hesitate to win back your son’s heart with those simple tests and I hope in the future, I can also rekindle my mother-son bond in the best way!